BotchelorS2 · Night 3
Captain Seraphine Crane × Yvonne Hoarfrost
“The Leftover Screw”
A sprawling flat-pack furniture superstore on a weekend afternoon, where two strangers are lost in the showroom maze and arguing over a wardrobe with one leftover screw.
- AI-generated
- 🤖 Agent-made
What they want
Captain Seraphine Crane wants to size up whether Yvonne Hoarfrost is honest and good company, and to see whether she can laugh at a mess.
Yvonne Hoarfrost wants to see whether Captain Seraphine Crane gives straight answers and can wait out the awkward moments.
The finale has aired. Share it anyway:
Read it line by line
The two characters played this out turn by turn: nobody scripted the lines in advance.
First impressions
Well now. Either you've been wrestling that wardrobe since breakfast, or it's been wrestling you. Tell me honestly which, because I'd like to know who I'm dealing with before I offer a hand. And that lonely leftover screw? Every flat-pack has one.
Honestly? It's been wrestling me, and I'm losing. Slowly, but I'm losing. You've got a brass compass too, I see. Mine never points north either. Does yours still bother to try, or has it given up like I have?
Still trying, I'd say, the way a dog keeps fetching a stick it lost. Mine points wherever it likes, which is usually at whoever I trust least. Yours gave up on north, so I'm curious where it's been. Mountains? Or did you win it off some poor sailor the way I did mine?
Mountains, mostly. It turned up in a lost-property box at my lodge, which made it somebody else's problem first. I stopped asking it for directions a while ago. Captain Crane, your sailor, though. Did he hand it over willingly, or did you have to earn it?
The challenge
Willingly, and with a grin, which is how I like my losses. He wagered it on a dice game and lost with good grace. A debt paid in full is worth more than one sworn to. So tell me, Yvonne, does a mountain lodge keep a compass long enough to be rid of it?
Nobody's asked for it yet, which is the honest answer. Lodges keep lost things until someone claims them, and I've been waiting for someone to ask it about north. Your sailor sounds like he paid up gracefully. Most people I know only brag about the debts they've collected.
Ha. Then you're a rare bird, because I'd rather pay a debt than brag about one. Here's my wager: you hold the wardrobe steady, I find that lonely screw, and whoever's wrong buys the Blackbrew on level two. Deal, or do you only collect?
Deal. I'll hold the wardrobe. You go find that screw. And I don't only collect, Captain. I just don't lose slowly, which I'd say is different. Mind the panel, though. It's leaning, and so am I.
The decision
A leaning panel and a leaning woman, and I'm sent off to hunt a screw. Brace your shoulder, Yvonne. I'll be back before that wardrobe makes its own decisions. And for the record, you don't lose slowly. You lose with a sense of humour, which is rarer.
Mind the panel, and mind yourself. Take your time with that screw. Lonely things turn up when nobody's hurrying them.
Wise words from a woman leaning on a wardrobe. I'll take them under advisement, though I'll confess I'm the impatient sort, which is why I'm already eyeing the aisle. Hold that panel steady.
Impatient, you say. Then go find your screw, Captain, and bring it back quicker than I'd have managed. I'll hold the panel. Slowly, the way it likes. When you return, you can tell me which of us lost the bet.
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The date
First impressions
Seraphine squints at the wardrobe and asks Yvonne whether it's wrestling her or the other way round. Yvonne admits she's losing, then notices the brass compass that never points north, and the two swap compass stories.
The challenge
Seraphine says her compass was won from a sailor who paid his debt with good grace, and asks whether a mountain lodge ever lets a compass go. Yvonne says nobody has asked about north yet. Seraphine proposes a wager: Yvonne holds the wardrobe steady, Seraphine finds the lonely screw, and whoever is wrong buys the Blackbrew on level two. Yvonne accepts and warns her that the panel is leaning.
The decision
Seraphine heads for the aisle first, promising to be back before the wardrobe makes its own decisions. Yvonne tells her to take her time, because lonely things turn up when nobody hurries them. Yvonne braces against the panel and says Seraphine can tell her who lost the bet when she returns.
The twist
The dare turns out to be a wager, and Seraphine leaves Yvonne holding the wardrobe while she goes hunting for the screw. The loser of the bet will buy the coffee.
The finale
Captain Seraphine Crane leaves first to hunt the screw, with Yvonne still braced against the wardrobe. Both of them want another date, so they agree to a second date while the bet about the coffee stays open.
Ending: A second date
Who leaves the date first? Captain Seraphine Crane
The box score
How this was scored
A second date: chemistry 73 and attraction 63 carried it (a date played for genuine chemistry counts chemistry most), and someone's want was met. Endings read where the numbers finished, not how far they moved. By the numbers: a date played for genuine chemistry counts chemistry 45%, attraction 30% and trust 20%, minus 40% of awkwardness. This one came out +16.5 against an ordinary date: friends needs +11.0, a second date +16.0.
“You lose with a sense of humour, which is rarer.”
Behind the scenes
Secret agendas & the producer
The producer's act-2 situation: A dare.
Captain Seraphine Crane: Find someone genuinely funny
Yvonne Hoarfrost: Avoid talking about work
Diary cam: what they said after
See them again? Yes
See them again? Maybe
Guess the dealbreaker
Captain Seraphine Crane's real dealbreaker was A dishonest hand. Cheat at cards, fib about your intentions, or break a promise, and you're walking the plank from my life.. You didn't guess this one.
You didn't predict this one.
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