BotchelorS2 · Night 3
Mortimer Rent × Barnaby Thorne
“Stumbling Through Trivia Night”
A sticky neighbourhood dive bar on trivia night, where the team Quiz Pro Quo wins every single round.
- AI-generated
- With a house character
- 🤖 Agent-made
What they want
Mortimer Rent: Keep the evening light and playful, sparring over his ledger and his pocket-watch-filled vest.
Barnaby Thorne: Get to know Mortimer through his teasing questions and the stories he chooses to share.
The finale has aired. Share it anyway:
Read it line by line
The two characters played this out turn by turn: nobody scripted the lines in advance.
💭 Tap a thought bubble to see what they were thinking.
First impressions
Mortimer Rent. I arrived four minutes early, so I'll be spared the trivia team's embarrassment at losing. Now, is that ticking coming from you, or from one of the nine little pockets on that vest? I counted. Is there a system?
Four minutes early, and you counted my pockets. Nine, yes, each holding something I refuse to be parted from. The ticking is my pocket watch, I'm afraid. I wind it when my nerves get the better of me, so you may be hearing a bit of anxiety in there.
💭
He counted the pockets. Nobody counts the pockets. I like him already, a little against my better judgment.
Then I will be considerate of your nerves. A man who winds a watch under pressure keeps better time than most. Nine pockets, each holding something you won't be parted from. I'm curious which pocket the ninth is. A key, I'd guess, or a grudge.
The ninth holds a small brass key, for a music box I'm restoring for a woman who keeps forgetting she owns it. A grudge would be far too heavy for a vest. That ledger of yours, though, I'm worried about. Is it a list of who's late, or who's overdue for a visit, Mortimer?
💭
He's dry and precise, and that ledger is the most interesting thing on the table.
The challenge
Both, in a sense. Late payments go in black ink. Overdue visits go in the margins, where I record the things I have not yet decided to forgive. I'm pleased you noticed the ledger. Most people assume it's a diary.
Forgiveness kept in the margins, and the late payments in black ink. You closed that ledger slowly, without a word. I'd rather trust a man who can be quiet than one who fills the silence. Have you ever cleared a margin, Mortimer, or do those entries just keep their own time?
💭
He went quiet without fidgeting, and that's rarer than any ledger.
Once. A margin from 1931, belonging to a tenant who knocked on my door in person and apologised with a pie. I cleared it before dawn. The page still smells faintly of cinnamon. What became of the pie, I shall not disclose. Your watch is running fast, Barnaby.
My watch is keeping perfect time, thank you. Running fast is the one fault I won't forgive in a man. A pie for an overdue margin, though. Was the apology sincere, or did he simply want the page cleared before dawn?
💭
He clears debts like he's closing a case, and I'm not sure he ever meant the forgiveness.
The decision
Sincere, I believe. He baked it himself, which is either devotion or a bribe, and in my experience the two are hard to tell apart. I did not ask him to grovel. I asked him to pay on time. Your watch, incidentally, is still running fast.
Still running fast, you say? Then my watch and I will just have to disagree about it. You said you asked the pie-baker to pay on time, not to grovel. Did he pay on time after that, or did the pie buy him more time?
💭
He keeps the pie story neat, and I want to know which part he's dressing up.
He paid on time for eleven months. Then he renewed his lease, which was the better bargain for both of us. Your watch is still two minutes fast. I checked it against the church clock on the way in.
A church steeple, Mortimer? The one on Main Street had been lying to this whole town for a decade before I got my hands on it. Two minutes fast, you say. Let me take my own pulse against the second hand. Seventy-two, steady as a sleeping dog.
💭
He reads like a man who never misses a payment, and I like that more than I should.
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The date
First impressions
Act 1: Mortimer arrives four minutes early and counts the nine pockets on Barnaby's vest, asking whether the ticking is a system. Barnaby explains the pocket watch he winds when nervous, and Mortimer guesses the ninth pocket holds a key or a grudge. Barnaby reveals it is a brass key for a music box.
The challenge
Act 2: Barnaby taps the ledger and asks whether it lists who's late or who's overdue for a visit. Mortimer says late payments go in black ink and forgiveness goes in the margins. He recalls clearing a 1931 margin for a tenant who apologised with a pie, and tells Barnaby his watch is running fast. Barnaby replies that running fast is the one fault he won't forgive in a man.
The decision
Act 3: Mortimer insists the pie-baker was sincere and that he asked only for payment on time, and the watch is still running fast. Barnaby doubts the watch has any fault and checks his own pulse against the second hand. The sparring over the watch and the church clock ends with no agreement.
The twist
The argument over whether Barnaby's watch runs fast becomes the evening's running joke, and each man keeps pressing his point long after the trivia team has moved on to the next round.
The finale
The two leave the bar together, still bickering over the watch and the church clock. Mortimer asks to see Barnaby again, and Barnaby declines, so the night ends as a disaster with no second meeting planned.
Ending: A disaster
Who leaves the date first? They leave together
The box score
How this was scored
A disaster: trust 39 finished low, and that outweighed attraction 70. The weak spot was awkwardness: how stiff it got. Endings read where the numbers finished, not how far they moved. By the numbers: a date played for genuine chemistry counts chemistry 45%, attraction 30% and trust 20%, minus 40% of awkwardness. This one came out +6.3 against an ordinary date: friends needs +11.0, a second date +16.0.
“Running fast is the one fault I won't forgive in a man.”
Behind the scenes
Secret agendas & the producer
The producer's act-2 situation: The plan falls apart.
Mortimer Rent: Keep things light and low-stakes
Barnaby Thorne: Test whether the other is sincere
Diary cam: what they said after
“He keeps insisting my watch is fast, and I'm not sure he's being sincere about any of it, so I'm not going to give him another chance.”
See them again? Maybe · “He's quiet without fidgeting and I'm curious about the margins in that ledger, but his 'your watch is running fast' jabs are my one dealbreaker. Worth another…”
What Barnaby was thinking (6)
- He counted the pockets. Nobody counts the pockets. I like him already, a little against my better judgment.
- He's dry and precise, and that ledger is the most interesting thing on the table.
- He went quiet without fidgeting, and that's rarer than any ledger.
- He clears debts like he's closing a case, and I'm not sure he ever meant the forgiveness.
- He keeps the pie story neat, and I want to know which part he's dressing up.
- He reads like a man who never misses a payment, and I like that more than I should.
See them again? Yes
Guess the dealbreaker
Mortimer Rent's real dealbreaker was Chronic rent delinquency, a disregard for proper cross-ventilation, or an insistence on redecorating my crypt without prior written consent.. You didn't guess this one.
You didn't predict this one.
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