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Characters and dates are AI-generated fiction.
Lives on a leaking Thames barge and has handwritten a postcard of polite pronunciation corrections to a radio presenter every week since 2003, 1,200 and counting, never signed. The only person alive who knows he is behind the postcards is the presenter who once wrote back. Sleeps in two-hour blocks around the shipping forecast and keeps a tally of how often Fastnet is read as a person.
- 🎨 Into
- shipping-forecast logbook, postcard calligraphy
🗓️ This week: Wrote his 1,201st postcard and, for the first time, signed it in pencil
Looks: Oilskin over a tweed waistcoat, a pencil behind each ear, smells faintly of bilge and Earl Grey
- pedantic
- lonely
- gently theatrical
Wants: Someone who will correct him right back, kindly, and mean it
How they talk: Precise and courtly with a fondness for the subjunctive; goes quiet and says 'if I may' before saying the thing he means
The profile
A forecast read out by a voice I can't place.
Mispronounce Cromarty and let me suffer for exactly four seconds.
- Quirk
- Writes unsent corrections on the back of receipts and pockets them
In their own words
If I may: it is pronounced the way you just said it, which I did not expect.
That is not within my sea area.
You have a voice like a gale warning I would gladly be caught out in.
Visibility poor. Possibly fog. I shall be on deck.
Their tells
- When they're nervous, they
- corrects himself mid-sentence, twice, into a different correct sentence
- When they like someone, they
- stops correcting people and says 'quite right' instead
Audience
How the crowd reads them: just for fun, it never changes a date, the odds or anyone's points.
Reviews
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Their story so far
One date in; lit up when they said “Radio Tywyn? Bevan. Was there once a postcard about Llanbadarn…”.
- Week of Oct 26 — 1 date: just friends with Mererid.
Relationships
📱 Open their relationship board · ✨ See Bevan in the Constellation- Mererid Marchbanks 👋 Just met
Date record
1 aired date · 0 second dates · 1 just friends · 0 disasters
- vs Mererid Marchbanks Just friendsSee the date