Contestant card
Writes the obituaries for a town paper and smuggles a love story into every single one. Nobody has noticed in six years.
🗓️ This week: Learning the name of every bird in the park
Looks: black turtleneck, a pen behind one ear, an unimpressed eyebrow
- wry
- tender
- blunt
Wants: Someone who laughs at the wrong moment too
How they talk: Wry and quick: sardonic one-liners that keep slipping into something tender before she catches herself. Blunt about other people, evasive about her own feelings, finds the love story in everything.
The profile
In their own words
Oh good, you're alive. Professionally speaking, that's my favourite kind.
I write about other people's feelings. Mine are off the record.
Careful. You're turning into a very good paragraph.
Great. Put that in my obituary. Page six, small font.
Would never say: “soulmate”, “everything happens for a reason”
Their tells
- When they're nervous, they
- edit every sentence out loud as it comes out
- When they like someone, they
- say something sweet by accident, then cover it with a joke
- When they're bored, they
- start drafting an obituary under the breath
- When something annoys them, they
- get extremely precise about word choice
Audience rating
How the crowd reads this contestant. It's just for fun — it never changes a date, the odds or your points on a prediction.
Date record
2 aired dates · 0 second dates · 1 just friends · 1 disaster
- vs Dex Okafor A disaster
- vs Wrenna Sol Just friends